Hillary Clinton

Angry Hillary Studying Chevy Chase Pratfalls for Debate

After angrily yelling at supporters in a labor union, blaming them for her woeful drop in the polls and asking why she is not 50 points ahead, Dem strategists hope to redeem themselves by making her look more presidential, competent, mammalian and hopefully, less odious. On a serious note, this does lend credence to reports that after a town hall with Matt Laur, she exploded afterwards and went after her staff, going into a tantrum, blaming them and calling DNC Chair Donna Brazille a "brown cow" who "stared at the wall like a brain dead buffalo." […]

Investigations

Julian Assange Has Paid a Devastating Price

"Mr Assange’s situation which is tantamount to a prisoner being detained indefinitely but without a prisoner’s normal physical health care and effectively in isolation… The harmful psychological and physical effects of indefinite detention include:  Severe and chronic anxiety and dread, Pathological levels of stress that have damaging effects on the core physiologic functions of the immune and cardiovascular systems, as well on the central nervous system, Depression and suicide, Post-traumatic stress disorder, Enduring personality changes and permanent estrangement from family and community that compromises and hope of the detainee regaining a normal life following release…" […]

Hillary Clinton

Sanders Backs HRC Election Fraud Win, Claims Moral High Ground

30 pieces of silver in hand is better than the mere promise of them, but we all know the dubious reward that it brought one certain individual. It’s as if Bernie Sanders, like Judas, gave Seth Rich and Shawn Lucas their last kiss before betraying them to the George Soros “Caiaphas,” and surrendered their souls to Hillary’s doomed campaign. Five DNC heads were fired over the rigging of the primary. There is an ongoing class action lawsuit against the DNC for fraud. Trump didn’t steal my vote. Hillary did. We know a lot of awful things about Trump, but we do know he doesn’t have a “Clinton mafia,” to use Colin Powell’s own words. Sanders is spitting on Shawn Lucas and Seth Rich’s grave. […]

Hillary Clinton

Bernie “Rug Bern” Sanders and a Fear-Based Narrative

Clinton suck up Jeff Weaver joins Sanders "Our Revolution" campaign, all 13 members revolt, massive friction. Giant vagina Bernie Sanders feels the burn. Our decisions when it comes to politics rely on primal emotions rather than reason, so we are now seeing Americans manipulated by the two deadliest emotions we're vulnerable to, hate and fear. As "Vagina Bern" Sanders creates a new "Trump terror" campaign to conceal Hillary's corruption scandals he is willfully creating a fear-based narrative to prevent voters from making an informed decision. […]

JAG

Study: Use of the Term “Conspiracy Theorist” Higher in Ignorant Assholes

Group conformity experiments have long revealed it, but now science confirms a strong correlation between an over-use of the term “conspiracy theorist” and “neurotic, ignorant assholes.” Scientists at Stanford University noted that:

“We’ve found most people don’t live in a binary world so when someone mocks your capacity for critical thinking, it’s not a plus for the antagonizing speaker or writer. Why we find neurosis is because core elements in this behavior are distress and anxiety. Most people don’t need their personal reality seconded, or usually humored, by everyone they see.” […]

Hillary Clinton

Jeff Bezos Accidentally Swallows Hillary’s Sputum, Enters Demonic Portal

Hillary Clinton's press tampon Jeff "Crazy Eyes" Bezos, a billionaire Clinton Foundation donor, was in the middle of spinning the latest fiasco in the Clinton campaign when, thirsty, he drank from a nearby glass of water on a podium. It proved to be a most unfortunate mistake.

Bezos, the owner of The Washington Post, has been put in charge of starting a war with Russia to keep the elites rich in case the dollar implodes at the end of the year. […]

Hillary Clinton

Hillary Regrets “basket of deplorables” Comment, Meant to Call Americans “basketcase peasant cocksuckers”

After a fierce backlash from Trump supporters and political handlers watching Hillary implode in a spectacular psychological controlled demolition, Hillary made a quick retraction to explain the gaffe.

"Look, I was wrong. I truly regret I called anyone a basket of deplorables. That is not what I meant to say. What I meant to say is that his supporters are basketcase peasant cocksuckers."

After rumors emerged that she was calling Donna Brazile, an African American, a "brown cow" and throwing a glass at aides after a disastrous Commander in Chief forum, Hillary has begun her charm offensive in earnest. […]

Hillary Clinton

Why Washington Post Wants Email Scandal Silenced

“…Bezos has enjoyed friendly ties with both the Obama administration and the CIA. As Michael Oman-Reagan notes, Amazon was awarded a $16.5 million contract with the State Department the last year Clinton ran it. Amazon also has over $600 million in contracts with the Central Intelligence Agency, an organization Sanders said he wanted to abolish in 1974, and still says he “had a lot of problems with.”

Billionaires love to launder their money. Jeff Bezos, for instance, owns Amazon and the Washington Post.

So the question is, how much did Bezos give the Clinton Foundation for access, for these lucrative CIA contracts that could only be awarded by Hillary? […]

Hillary Clinton

Hillary Boasts Kissenger Backing, “Satan support and coveted herpes diagnosis.”

Fresh on the heels of a Henry Kissinger endorsement, recognized and wanted as a war criminal in several countries he can no longer step foot in, Hillary proudly announces a ringing endorsement from Satan, the Prince of Darkness. "This is kind of a no brainer," chirped a proud Satan. "She's been Employee of the Month for 46 months straight. From Iraq to Syria, Gaza to Afghanistan, you name it, there is no end to the dead children she's delivered me in her quest to end her life as US President. To her I say 'well done, my good and faithful servant.'  Now come, it is time to go home." […]

Hillary Clinton

Washington Post: “Leave Hillary alone!”

Chris Cillizza makes a poignant plea after serious concerns over Clinton's health pop up around the world. Fine. Let's get back to the pay-for-play then? Pending perjury impeachment? But wait! It was Clinton herself who used her concussion, and the subsequent brain damage, to excuse events she couldn't remember in an FBI interview of July of 2016.

Speaking of medical intervention, Chris, your cognitive dissonance also requires immediate professional attention. Please step away from the keyboard, and pick up that phone RIGHT NOW. Operators are standing by at 1 800 GET CLUE. […]

Hillary Clinton

Media Forgets Hillary’s Unaccountability Means She Can Hang Them, Too

This may be the one chance they get to stop this.

There is a consistent pattern where those who help despots into power eventually pay dearly for it. With Hitler, we saw the "Night of the Long Knives" where he killed all potential threats to his leadership once he was in a position of power to do so. Hitler's first target, even before that night, was the press. Right now, Hillary's supporters are being paid well to write favorably on her behalf, but eventually, they will write favorably, or else. […]

Hillary Clinton

Local Idiot Follows Cyndi Lauper’s Lead When Voting

Michelle Smegma, 46, of Encino, CA announced this morning that she will vote for Hillary Clinton because Cyndi Lauper "said Donald Trump is Hitler." Though Adolf Hitler has been dead since 1945 and there is no evidence that Trump has dedicated his life to hunting down Jews, building death camps and waging genocidal wars of conquest, Smegma is still convinced they are one and the same person. Her husband, Sam Smegma, 50, notes "Michelle thinks Lauper was being literal, so she believes that hysterical pop star metaphors displaying an unflattering lack of perspective and literacy warrant an overruling of her own reservations about Clinton. She is, after all, an idiot, bless her simple heart." […]