Entertainment

The Society for the Appreciation of Bitch Slappin’ the Mimes

The Impious Digest hires only the best and strongest pimps to administer the bitch slappin' we give to mimes across the nation. But it's not cheap. Ice packs (for bruised knuckles), travel expenses, bail money and legal fees are just part of the expenses incurred in our efforts to make every child smile. Our pimps charge an hourly wage, but a fair one. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

Celebrity Psycho Therapy

My name is Dr. Hugh Janus and I am a psychologist. I have been commissioned to analyze the following celebrities with only their public behavior and writings to guide me through the twisted wreckage of their minds. Though some of the psychological terminology may seem obscure to the layman, this is written with the latter in mind. Some of the conditions the professional may recognize in the the DSM-V- TR (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) but a few new categories, terms and conditions have been added. […]

Cloak and Dagger

Captain America’s Very Real-life Parallels

NSA whistle blower William Binney: “The ultimate goal of the NSA is total population control.” Like the real-life Skull and Bones, Hydra was a Nazi cabal that infiltrated every level of US government. The former recruited Nazi SS men into the CIA under Bonesman Allen Dulles and George H. W. Bush, creating an unnaccountable secret government. […]

JAG

Scarring a Generation of Children for Political Agendas

Children will mirror your behavior and fear what you fear and hate what you hate. Children watch your behavior and are also saturated by media coverage, and if poor will hate themselves in proportion to the massive propaganda campaign against them. If the hateful memes of trolls appear on their social networks the effect is worse because now it is peers that are judging them. The entire campaign against people on SNAP wasn't just about shaming the poor but rallying the nation against them, and it would be unfair to say FOX News managed to do this all on their own. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

Court Docs Reveal Bill O’Reilly Owned a Vibrator

First a disclaimer: no one is knocking phone sex or the insertion of sex tools into the rectum by geriatrics, per se. It's imposing this behavior on an unwilling partner young enough to be his granddaughter that is offensive to the civilized senses, especially when this is literally the man who sets the tone for right-wing morality in America. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

Cheney’s Torture Fetish

Bybee's memo (not to mention a few others) is damning evidence suggesting a common plan on the part of the Administration to violate the laws of war. Strikingly, such a "common plan," or conspiracy, is itself a war crime. […]

JAG

How Fanatical Atheism Gave Us the Tea Party

There is a very strong, tactically palsied movement by fanatical atheists today to crush religion, particularly Christianity. The way this movement is led, unfortunately, is as a militant movement that demeans and ridicules people of faith. The common wisdom is that once an idea is sufficiently mocked and ridiculed, then that is the moment the idea dies. For the proponents of this common wisdom, please do tell! how has this worked out for you? It’s only been tried for thousands of years, but maybe you just need a few more days. […]

2017 JFK Files

Operation Northwoods and the Plot to Blame the JFK Assassination on Castro

"Operation Northwoods was a series of false flag proposals that originated within the United States government in 1962, but were rejected by the Kennedy administration. The proposals called for the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), or other operatives, to commit perceived acts of terrorism in U.S. cities and elsewhere. These acts of terrorism were to be blamed on Cuba in order to create public support for a war against that nation, which had recently become communist under Fidel Castro. […]

History

Why the Klan is Protected by Democrats and Republicans

"[Allen] Dulles was not acting out of kindness. He wanted to put these men to work as spies who would murder and kill in the name of the good ‘ol USA. Even before the war ended, Dulles had begun recruiting Gestapo agents, that is, members of the German Order of Skull and Bones, the Brotherhood of Death, into what would become the American version of the Gestapo, the CIA. As recently revealed by the CIA (5) and as documented by Christopher Simpson, in his extensively researched book, Blowback, “hundreds of convicted Nazi war criminals” were “smuggled out of Germany to avoid prosecution at the war crimes trials at Nuremberg.” They were “recruited by, and were put on the payroll of several U.S. government agencies, including the Army CIC, the OSS, and the Office of Policy Coordination within the State Department.” […]

Censorship

It Was Johnson

The Copy Cat Crime: Andrew Johnson and Lyndon B. Johnson On January 23, 1923, William J. Burns, by then the acting director of the Department of Justice wrote “I have gone over with considerable interest the […]

Entertainment

Robert Pattinson’s Unibrow Walks Off Set

Robert Pattinson of "Twilight" fame had no comment after his unibrow walked off the set in a bitter contract dispute with producers refusing to recognize it as autonomous and sentient. Presently filming his new teen romance "Smell My Finger, Dudes", Robert had little to say except he can't resume filming until he stops waking up to this… […]

Censorship

When Klansmen Killed “a thousand future generations of n*ggers”

FBI’s own evidence and unclassified documents prove Wayne Williams wrongly convicted for the murder of 30 black children… “Mrs. Catherine Leach is enraged that the best kept secret from the public in this crisis Is the brutal manner in which most of the children were mutilated. It is common to find among the bodies— castrations, hands amputated, feet amputated, lips and ears cut off, as well as part of the face. Why, the secret? It reads like old-fashion racist killings.” […]