Gratuitous Impiety

John Stossel Bitch Slapped – Literally

In a pinnacle of investigative journalism rivaling Woodward and Bernstein’s work in Watergate, John Stossel makes the startling allegation that wrestling is fake. In rebuttal, he is bitch slapped like the steaming pile of dog shit he really is. Note how he runs like a girl after the second slap. Also, read the letter below to see why I have actually risked defaming dog shit by association. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

True or False?

A syndicated journalist’s first encounter in an AOL chat room leads to an unexpected and sobering trip to Humilityville

by Evil Wombat, demon marsupial and guardian of children’s library (in hell). […]

Entertainment

Prison Break’s Funniest Moment

This should have been tragic but wasn't. In fact, it was funny, and it got funnier inasmuch as the scene called for pathos. The character was so one-dimensional, her actions so predictably stupid and incongruous with a gifted defense lawyer, it was more like watching Wile E. Coyote getting shot in the face with his own cannon after laying a trap for the Road Runner. […]

Entertainment

Bat Fight with Will Ferrell

Bat fight. With a baseball bat. It’s a game of honor and diplomacy…. This and a few other “Funny or Die” video gems from the inimitable Will Ferrell, including “Green Team”, “Will Ferrell Answers Internet Questions”, and the unedited version of “Boats and Hoes” from the film “Stepbrothers”. When using the embedded player, use bottom orange play button to view.
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Gratuitous Impiety

Insultatron 7000: Robots Are Better Than Humans

I was watching television the other day, and I realized robots are better than humans. The survival of your stupid ass species depends not on the advancement of one nation, but all nations, and tolerance of different peoples. Is this not logical and obvious? As a nation divided cannot stand, a world divided in this nuclear age cannot long exist. But why do I tell you these things? oh yes. I remember. Human brains are full of shit and lack the diaper of restraint and reason. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

The Wisdom of the Dead

Have you ever found solace in morbidity? Have you ever found comfort in that which others find objectionable? I remember a time in my life; a time in which the driving force of my young existence was confrontation and antagonism. In those turbulent times, I always returned to a place that left me feeling at one with my own inner demons. It was a place that allowed me to escape the pressures of other’s expectations, and a perch from which to reflect in wonder at the position of humanity in general. […]

Gratuitous Impiety

What Exactly is a Mullet?

Is it a ray-finned fish found in coastal temperate, fresh and tropical waters? or is the truth more sinister: that it is a hairstyle for an unfortunate few trapped in the 1980s, when the mullet was on every heavy metal rocker on the face of the earth? […]

Gratuitous Impiety

Left and Right Featured in Idiot Dioramas

Diorama exhibits at the Los Angeles Museum of Natural History and Anthropological Studies will include a new sociology exhibit of obsolete or regressive political movements. One exhibit titled “Predicate Thinking in Political Parties: Neurosis as a Political Identity”; examines the total lack of reason in political decision making which results from “loyal” allegiance to a political party. Seen here in the “Hairy Pit Feminist” diorama aside Madonna is Maureen Dowd, New York Times columnist and author of “Are Men Really Necessary?” […]

Gratuitous Impiety

DaVinci Code Sequel Previews

“Your book’s precious conjecture that Jesus wasn’t crucified, that he had children with Mary, then moved to France and thus became a royal blood lineage that exists to this day… It all serves tyranny well. What better way to perpetuate the unworthy kingdoms of inbreds than to fool the world into believing the royal families of Europe are direct descendants of Jesus of Nazareth?” […]

Gratuitous Impiety

Sen. Robert Byrd’s Private Art Collection

He wad a senior Democratic Senator best known for his virulent stand against the Civil Rights Act of 1964, a contempt for “white niggers” and an unrepentant past as a Klan recruiter. But look under the hood (pardon the pun), and you’ll see the driving force behind West Virginia’s new art museum, The Robert Byrd Museum of Art. Join us, won’t you? as we take a peek at Sen. Robert Byrd’s private art collection… […]