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A stupefying new Ministry of Industry and Trade (MIT) report circulating in the Kremlin today reveals that for the second time this year, emergency supplies of Russian natural gas had to be shipped to the American region of New England whose nearly 15 million overwhelmingly Democratic Party citizens were facing an imminent shutdown of their entire electrical grid due to what can only be described as stupidity—and whose future remains bleak as rolling blackouts are predicted to hit them all by 2024. […]

According to this report, modern time fears that our planet was nearing a new ice age period were first raised, in 1975, when Newsweek Magazine published an article titled “The Cooling World”—and wherein its author, Peter Gwynne, cited various US government scientists claiming that they had observed “ominous signs” that our Earth was cooling—but that provided no firm scientific evidence as to how such a conclusion was reached—with Gwynne, also, in 2014, recanting his article and stating: “While the hypotheses described in that original story seemed right at the time, climate scientists now know that they were seriously incomplete.” […]