That’s 53 years ago.

Satellite Imagery, Cuban Missile Crisis 1962
cuban-missile-satellite-image

Here’s an even older satellite photo:

Discoverer 14 satellite, Corona missions, 1960

Baikonaur-1960-Discoverer-14-NASM

The Soviet launch site at Baikonur as seen by the Discoverer 14 satellite, one of the Corona missions, in 1960. Credit: National Air and Space Museum

One would think given the explosive nature of events in the Ukraine, you would see something a little more sophisticated, and detailed, than 1960’s technology. But one would be wrong. Behold the latest from Geoffrey “You Suck at Photoshop” Pyatt, US Ambassador to the Ukraine, as he tries to undermine the cease fire for the hawks back home.

Screen Shot 2014-09-18 at 1.06.52 PM.jpgPlease note the remarkable detail and technological advances we’ve made in 55 years:

  • once conclusive and detailed images have been improved by blurring them, with sophisticated techniques such as coating the satellite camera lens with Vaseline for an artistic and “softening” glow
  • resolution has been drastically reduced to save on photo size,
  • zooming impossible as pictures are low resolution, this to blur the Nazi insignia on Right Sector uniforms of Ukrainian troops.

Ukrainian Satellite Evidence, 2015
B9ydHVpIEAAAvAlB9yTg-DCEAA7_vY

"Number 8" by Jackson Pollack

“Number 8” by Jackson Pollack

This isn’t actionable intelligence. It is not even a second cousin of intelligence.

This is the monopoly money of satellite imagery.

This is the photographic equivalent of a Jackson Pollack. This is just sad.

pyatt_gumby

US Ambassador to the Ukraine Geoffrey Pyatt

Field Operative prepares to send spoof satellite data to Pyatt.

Field operative code named “Pikachu” prepares to send spoof satellite data to Pyatt.

Here’s an actual photograph of Pyatt as he picked up the “secret satellite imagery of a Russian incursion.” Source?  a neighborhood kid saavy enough to download WWII aerial shots and charge him 100 bucks a piece.

Sucker!

In all seriousness, though, some important questions need to be asked: for example, what is so important about the Ukraine that US leaders are not only risking World War III by provoking Russia, but seem hell bent on starting it even on demonstrable false pretenses?

The best answer may be found here.

Related Post