BREAKING NEWS: Hillary is Still Not President

Dr. Pepe Le Frogg announced today that Hillary’s alter personality has been identified as a Russian spy named Agent Govniuk, a self-destructive splinter of her personality that loves to sabotage her life. Govniuk is Russian for a very naughty word, incidentally. This incredibly self-destructive alter, when in control, made sure she ran while under a criminal FBI investigation. It made sure she rigged the primary and sabotaged Bernie Sanders’ campaign and lost his supporters when they found out. It was responsible for her calling half of Americans racist, deplorables, irredeemables, xenophobes, and sexists. Because “Agent Govniuk” blames everyone else for her mistakes, she cannot self-correct, so she continuously fails no matter how much she is assisted by political operatives and donors. […]

John Podesta is “shopping on the sidelines” to the over 15,000 participants from 100 nations of this global event a “world altering” $1 million expected fee speech Secretary Clinton wants to make in Moscow exposing an “extraterrestrial cover-up” that cost her the election against President Trump—and that Podesta is previewing with his appearance on an American television programme called “Ancient Aliens” wherein he states “Secretary Clinton, likewise, was also kind of interested in the topic, and during the course of the campaign said that, if elected, she would have ordered a more thorough declassification review”—and that sheds new light on why, this past weekend, Clinton appeared at a Yale University commencement address where she donned a traditional Russia ushanka and proclaimed “If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em”.  […]

Coming just days after legendary former top FBI official James Kallstrom warned that the FBI was now “a criminal ‘Fifth Column’ running an illegal conspiracy to topple President Trump”, a stunning new Security Council (SC) report circulating in the Kremlin today states that just hours ago (Sunday evening/6 May in US), Katrina Pierson, President Trump’s top advisor for his 2020 reelection campaign, appeared before the American people on the Fox News television programme “The Next Revolution With Steve Hilton” wherein she solemnly confirmed the existence of a plot to “overthrow the President of the United States” in what she called a “silent coup” being led by the “Deep State”. (Begin viewing at 5:35 and 9:16 to see Katrina Pierson’s shocking revelations) […]