BREAKING NEWS: Hillary is Still Not President

An embittered Hillary Clinton emerged today to blast the malicious and dangerous "fake news" that got her hopes up by proclaiming her certain win. "All of you who got my hopes up need to take the blame… Why did you play me like that? Why did you so cruelly make my win appear so certain, only to have it taken from my grasp? You in the media with your fake news of sunny days ahead destroyed me emotionally and politically. These burns on my lips, that's on you fuckers, you got me sucking on a tail pipe this morning to improve my outlook." […]

According to this report, with the American people being kept distracted with the seemingly to never end political turmoil engulfing their nation in violence, their attention has been diverted from where it rightfully belongs, the South American failed communist state known as the Bolivarian Republic of Venezuela. […]

According to this report, on 29 March 2018, US Health and Human Services Secretary Alex Azar announced that President Trump had appointed Daniel M. Best to be the Senior Advisor to the Secretary for Drug Pricing Reform, and whose mandate “would lead the initiative to lower the high price of prescription drugs”—a job well suited for this former American pharmaceutical executive as he “knew where the bodies are buried”. […]