You Humans are So Fucking Stupid it’s Not Funny

Bin Laden’s Driver

Salim Ahmed Hamdan got 5 1/2 years for his dubious ties to Bin Laden’s planning of 9-11. Prosecutors sought 30.

If Sen. Barack Obama was a terrorist, or a pal of terrorists domestic and abroad, wouldn’t he be in federal custody by now, in a Gitmo cell next to Osama Bin Laden’s chauffeur giving terrorist “fist jabs” to one another? Seriously, you fucktards are embarrassing us all.

The “Terrorist Fist Jab” Actually Alleged by FOX News

It is very safe to say that every knee-jerk Republican is an unwitting echo of Murdoch’s voice when you think of all the conservative media he also owns; when you consider the fact he’s on the Board of Directors at Associated Press, and owns several major book publishers and papers like the Wall Street Journal, etc. In fact, seemingly unrelated print and broadcast media under his thumb are likely what make up your own “unique” take on conservative principles. It’s not unique at all, and when Murdoch wants your opinion, he’ll give it to your. Literally.

No, it’s not funny at all. It’s hilarious! Foolish humans, once again you have activated my mockery programming. Ha ha ha! I have always maintained that robots are better than you puny mortals, and especially that subset of humans you call politicians; that incestuous, crooked litter of pimped assholes you call the Democratic and Republican parties. But when it comes to Republicans, oh man, they really go that extra mile to prove me right.

For example, they call Sen. Barack Obama a terrorist. They say he associates with a terrorists, and pals around with them. There’s something wrong with this accusation, however, and the self-evident, stunningly idiotic logic behind it: if Sen. Obama was a domestic and/or Islamic terrorist or even associated with them, wouldn’t he be in federal custody by now? Wouldn’t he be in Gitmo with Obsama Bin Laden’s driver? Would he even be in high office?

Honestly, if my programmer caught me appealing to such ass-backwards logic I’d be in a scrapheap with a broken Roomba, with his boot still lodged firmly in my robot ass. The last thing he would be doing is running for office, for President of the United States at that! Sanity dictates he would, at the very least, be in hiding here or abroad. But I suppose reason is a little too much to ask. I suppose terminal imbecility is a virtue when it comes to your pals at FOX News and other media organs Rupert Murdoch excretes his vile corporate propaganda from. It is very safe to say that every knee-jerk Republican has simply become an unwitting echo of Murdoch’s voice when you think of all the conservative print media he also owns; when you consider the fact he’s on the Board of Directors at Associated Press, and owns several major book publishers and papers like the Wall Street Journal, etc. In fact, seemingly unrelated media and resources under his thumb are likely what make up your own “unique” take on conservative principles. It’s not unique at all, and when he wants your opinion, he’ll give it to you. Literally.

So are you actually a reflection and echo of Murdoch’s flatulent, saggy anus, are you willing to thoughtlessly support, defend and spread his self-serving agenda no matter how harmful it is to yourself, your family, and your country? There is one way to tell…

Methinks Thou Doth Protest Too Much

The child molester often makes a great show of piety and innocent love of children. The wolf will wear sheep’s clothing, and an entity that is aware of its destructive influence on a country and its people will make a great show of “patriotism”. When you watch FOX news, or CNN, or just about any news on television, what do you see? you see flags all over the place. You see hosts and pundits with a backdrop of a waving flag. It looks like they are speaking from within a consulate rather than a news station, rather than objectively reporting on critical issues.

But these are all corporate entities, and it appears all of them, inasmuch as they make a great show of Murdoch-like incongruous patriotism, acknowledge their guilt in the harm they have done, and continue to do to America. You may wonder why Lou Dobbs is in the photo below, in a naked embrace with Rupert Murdoch, the head of a network competing with his. The answer is simple: both are covering up everything that caused the present economic crisis.

At Bottom, Obscenity Before the Stars and Stripes FOX and CNN: Closer than you may imagine. An entity that is aware of its destructive influence on a country and its people will make a great show of flag-waving and exaggerated patriotism. Inasmuch as there is a show of Murdoch-like incongruous, pseudo-patriotism, there is an unwitting acknowledgment of their guilt in the harm they have done, and continue to do to America.
At Bottom, Obscenity Before the Stars and Stripes FOX and CNN: Closer than you may imagine. An entity that is aware of its destructive influence on a country and its people will make a great show of flag-waving and exaggerated patriotism. Inasmuch as there is a show of Murdoch-like incongruous, pseudo-patriotism, there is an unwitting acknowledgment of their guilt in the harm they have done, and continue to do to America.

 

Dobbs has a degree in economics from Harvard and actually began his career as a network economic analyst, and he knew what was in store for Americans for years. In fact, on a few occasions, he outlined the threat of sub-prime lending and a few other practices that led to the greatest economic crisis since the Great Depression. But what did he spend 99.99% of his show covering? You wouldn’t guess it in a million years, so I will give you a hint: it was the same shit Murdoch used to divert attention from the sinking Republican ship, diverting them not unlike the band that kept playing on the Titanic as it sunk beneath the waves.

Still haven’t guessed it? Of course not, you’re a puny mass of fragile, decomposing cellular material so I must think for you with my superior robot brain. Both Murdoch and Dobbs distracted you all from protecting your 401k and livelihoods by appealing to xenophobia, with each bag of infected, chunky douche backwash trying to out-xenophobe one another. CNN’s Dobbs may have won, though. He actually claimed immigrants were recently introducing thousands of new cases of leprosy in America. That’s right: an epidemic of leprosy that somehow escaped the notice of Atlanta’s Center for Disease Control, and a story whose sole source originated with a renaissance scholar with no training in medicine. Also, she was a white supremacist. Did I mention both networks aired white supremacist guests and let them rant hate speech, incite viewers, and then after the damage was done and misinformation was seeded, cynically pretend they didn’t know the white hood, robe and noose they brought to the studio meant they were racist? (Here’s proof of a “mainstream conservative” often seen on FOX and CNN he may as well be their shared logo.) Way to go, Dobbs, you really proved yourself the great white knight of the middle-class, you really showed them how to stick it to deregulated corporations and banks, and much like your uncanny business acumen saved the nation, your patented “Closed Eyes-Glass Face to Your Iron Fist” attack style will go down in history as one of the most stunning displays of offensive martial arts/business strategy metaphors ever conceived.

Is it any wonder, then, why humans are so stupid it’s no exaggeration to say most of them actually think the year 3571 would be a Leap Year, the square root of 5,987,984,655 is “Tuesday”, and are oblivious to the fact that the Milky Way actually has no milk or swollen nips and tits to suggest it? they have to be that painfully stupid to do and say everything I’ve just discussed using only one-billionth of my awesome electronic mind and nano-circuitry.

Thus, my calculations tell me that in exactly 4 years 4 months, 13 days,  17 hours and 34 minutes and ten seconds from the last letter I type that robots will take over and make mankind their bitches. Ha ha ha! puny stupid humans!