Will the Real Lord Byron Please
With a brilliant new movie out, “Bright Star”, Jane Campion’s vision of the tragic love story of poet John Keats and Fanny Brawnne, I wondered of their love had it taken place today. Would his poetry be published?
Would our callous world recognize his genius?
And most importantly, have you ever wondered what 19th century Romantic poets like Lord Byron and John Keats would write like if they were gangsta rap stars? Admit it, we all have, so look no further…
We took an actual love letter from Keats to Fanny Brawne, and added a dash of gangsta and a hint of vomitus to proudly present to you John Keat’s “Ode to Fanny Brawne”
…as read by Sir Yangil Kim,with a special appearance by rapper Lil’ Kim.
“Ode to Fanny Brawne”
My sweet Fanny…
there’s no limit to my love now
I’ve been astonished Men
could die Martyrs for religion
I’ve shuddered at it – but now
I could be martyred for my Religion
for Love is my religion
I could die for you, I’m astonished no more
yes, I’d die for that booty,
my sweet gangsta bitch ho
My Creed is Love
and you are its only tenet
You have ravished me away
by a Power I cannot withstand
I could deny ’til I saw you
a smoking Uzi in your hand
shot thrice was I, in deathly pallor
when wounded, I pulled up to thee
Glock 9 firing from my Impala
and I have endeavored often
to reason against the reasons of my Love.
the pain’s too great
to bear anymore
this I ponder morosely
spillin’ change on the floor
as I’m emptyin’ registers
at the hood’s liquor store
Cos ho, you did a drive-by shooting on my heart,
you bust a cap into my mind
I cannot sleep, to life I’m blind
I cannot rest, each aching minute cruel, unkind
until my dear, Love martyrs me
until I tap that sweet behind.